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Greg Cote Thinks Bill Parcells Is Senile

By Brinson | March 2, 2008

Personally, I think Bill Parcells is still just fine, given that position of authority he’s taken with the Miami Dolphins. And personally, I think Greg Cote should have his journalist license revoked. Via Dave at FanHouse (with the superb title of “Miami Herald Columnist Is Smitten with Mittens”) comes this little piece of crazy, wherein Cote states emphatically that the Dolphins would be better off going after Mister Freaking Mittens as the “right now” answer to the team’s quarterback issues.

It isn’t as much the splendiferous-ness of the man as the squalor of the team that brings me to say this with a surprisingly straight face:

The Dolphins should sign David Carr.

Look, I get where he’s coming from. Kind of. It’s understandable to think, in the delirium of a 1-15 season, that maybe David Carr and his untapped potential/upside/yada is perhaps the answer for the woeful quarterback situation in Miami. But it is not. And not to make excuses, but it was a lot easier to think that before we saw what Mittens did last year.

And that’s the thing, Greggers, that makes me think you are crazy and/or high (most likely “and”). Were you so entertained on Sundays last season that you never got a chance to catch any highlights of the 2007 Carolina Panthers? Because there were no highlights. None at all. Mittens sunk us. I sat right here on this blog and got his back for 13 weeks, and I am telling you, he is not good. So, allow me to join in with Dave when saying, put down the pipe, brah. And yeah, odds of this happening are actually lower than zero; remember, Tuna likes his ball-holding, sack-taking statuesque quarterbacks a little older than Mittens anyway.